When I was a young girl, I rode the bus to and from school. On the afternoon journeys home, I sat next to my best friend, the bookworm, who always had her head buried in her book while I silently suffered, longing for intimate conversation. Oh, she answered my questions, but anything requiring more than “Uh, huh” was completely disregarded. After many frustrating attempts to hold a decent conversation, I finally gave up and retreated into silence until one day came the Great Awakening.
It was our usual afternoon trip home, when interesting accounts of our day should have been exchanged. But instead, one of us was looking out the window while the other was slumped over into her book. At a stop, the bookworm slowly rose, muttered a good-bye, and walked down the aisle and off the bus. It wasn’t her stop, but I said not a word because it was my moment of triumph. Of course, she was back on the bus before it continued on down the road, but that one instance proved my point. She learned her lesson and became much more attentive from that point on.
Who or what gets your attention? Do your children bear the brunt of “Uh, huhs,” instead of receiving your complete attention? As of late, I know that I find myself concentrating so intently on all my responsibilities that I barely acknowledge my children while they’re talking and answer with barely audible “Uh, huhs.” Later when I ask what they’re doing in one of those, “I can’t believe what I’m seeing” tones, and they tell me that I gave my approval, I realize that “I’ve gotten off at the wrong stop,” and I should listen more carefully. More importantly though, is for my children to know I love them, respect and esteem them enough to hang onto every word they say. When talking to any of you, except at busy meetings, I wouldn’t focus on other things while you needed my attention or answer you with “Uh, huhs.” I look into your eyes, concentrate on what you say, and hopefully comment appropriately. I always treated my children with this same respect until lately. Distracted with the urgencies of the moment, details and deadlines, I have neglected my first duty. However, I’m now diligently working on directing my focus back on my children even during hectic times.
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